Saturday, February 6, 2010

My children will probably hate me

I know when my boys see this post, they will both cuss the day I learned about a blogspot. I’m sure Tommy will be so sorry he taught me anything about it and Ray will probably cuss his brother for teaching me.  But, this is a Mom’s right – to show pictures of her children.  And I honestly don’t think any of them can be considered embarrassing.

This picture is of Tommy (and if I fall back on old habits and call him TJ, just bear with me ‘cause he’s been TJ to me all his life).  He was born Thomas Swartz Jordan, III on June 24, 1977, a Friday. We didn’t have a hospital on the Outer Banks then and my doctor was in  Elizabeth City.  I had been in labor since my doctor visit on Wednesday but  went into hard labor in the wee hours of Friday morning and you might know the truck gas tank was hugging “E”. We stopped at a gas station (TW’s Bait and Tackle now), filled up with gas and a highway patrolman was there.  He was a friend of ours and when he saw the situation, he gave us an escort all the way to the Currituck Bridge and another patrolman took over at the other end and escorted us all the way to Elizabeth City.  I look back now and realize what unusual treatment that was. TJ came into the world, yelling all the way, late Friday afternoon, weighing 8 lbs. 8oz.

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He had a head full of black hair and the longest legs I had ever seen on a baby.The picture above was taken on Monday after we got home.  Shortly after it was taken, his Daddy took him to Al VanCurrin’s restaurant for his first cup of coffee.  (See – his addiction goes way back!). My Mom, who had been with us for almost 3 months because I had been confined to bed, almost had a fit that his Dad was carrying him out in public.  In her time, you didn’t do that with newborn babies – germs and all that stuff. 

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Here he is probably about 5 or 6 months old.   He really changed a lot in those first few months.  These overalls were a gift from his Papa; note the hammer and saw on the front. 

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This was his first professional picture that Nanny Jordan insisted he have.  Personally, I think I take pictures that are just as good.   He really looks bashful; but any of you that know him, know that he doesn’t have a bashful bone in his body.

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This was taken at Roses Department Store. My Mama, who TJ called “Muver” had this one taken.  I had to fight to get a copy.

 

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I think this was the first school picture.  I hate to admin that I didn’t write the dates on the back of the big pictures.  I always put it on the small copies.

 

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This is another school picture and I might have this one and the one before it switched as far as time goes.  My old brain just won’t remember.

 

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This is another Olin Mills picture that Nanny Jordan wanted.  He wasn’t quite so bashful looking in this one.

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Shortly after their Dad and I separated, the kids and I moved to the Pink Shell Cottage Court where I was the live-in Manager.  Sometimes it was a real struggle to manage my full time job as an accountant, my second full time job as manager of the Pink Shell and my third full time job as a Mom.  And, I am sorry the “Mom Job” was usually the job that went lacking.  My kids were very good about helping out at the Cottage Court.  They had certain chores of their own that made my job a little easier.  I really do regret the lost time; I can’t do anything to recover it but I do know that as they got older, they understood.

 

Raymond Thomas Jordan came into the world Tuesday, May 19, 1981, weighing 8 lbs. 14 oz.  His Dad was in Delaware working when Ray was born and got there 2 days later.  I had to go stay with my Mama in March, again because I was confined to bed and Ray was born in Edenton, NC.  The  labor was long and hard and there were several complications with his birth. I had been trying for a long time and was very tired.  But, I heard the doctor say he was going to have to break his collar bones so he could be born and that mother instinct kicked in and with both of us screaming, he arrived. He also had a head full of black hair and was very bruised.  Mama’s next door neighbor had delivered a little girl the day before Ray was born and when she brought TJ to visit, she first carried him to the nursery to see his baby brother.  When Mama pointed out Ray to him, he told her he didn’t want the “bruised one” – he wanted the pretty pink little girl. (See, even then he was checking out the girls.)  I had to stay in the hospital a few extra days and had to leave Ray one day longer because he was jaundiced. When Ray was only 4 weeks old, the family traveled to Delaware to move his Daddy back home.  Tommy and TJ were in the truck and Ray and I in my car. We had CB radios to stay in touch.  Two days after we got back to Nags Head, Ray had his trip to Al VanCurrin’s restaurant for his first cup of coffee. 

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There is a considerable contrast between the picture above and the picture below. Ray’s hair was very curly and his Daddy got tired of people telling him what a handsome little boy (TJ) and beautiful girl (Ray) he had that I had to cut his hair.  I cried the whole time I was cutting it.  And he wouldn’t just let me cut it shorter, he made me give him a GI haircut.  But, I have to admit, Ray had the physique  to handle the haircut.  His Dad called him his little marine.

 

This picture was his first professional picture taken at Rose’s Department Store. He wasn’t very happy; in fact, in the original 8 x 10, you can see tears in eyes.  My Mama had this picture taken. Ray called her “Wuver”.

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The next two pictures were taken Christmas, 1982. Ray was 19 months old. These were the second professional set, taken by Olin Mills.  Nanny Jordan had these taken. His haircut  reminds me of the little boy on Dutch Boy paints.

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This was his school picture, about fifth or sixth grade. 

 

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This is the last school picture of Ray that was taken.  He was living with his Dad in Murphy, NC at the time and was in the High School band. He played the saxophone.

 

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Looking back at their lives, I wish things could have been different.  I wish their Dad and I had been able to make a go of our marriage and been a complete family.  I wish I could have had more time to spend with them and do more things with them.  I had to work really hard to make ends meet and even harder for them to have some of the extras their friends had.  I know sometimes I let them down; but I tried hard to be a good Mom.  I love my boys very much.  They fought, like all brothers do, but they would also defend each other to the end of the earth.  TJ could call Ray names and Ray could call TJ names, but nobody else could. They have each had struggles in their lives but I think if they were to be honest, they would tell you most of the time the struggles were because of something they themselves did or did not do.

I am also proud of my boys.  They are very different in the things they want to do and in their outlook on life.  Both of them are very smart.  They both love to read, which is something I think I passed on to them.  I never fussed at them for “having their head in a book” as their Daddy called it.  They both love to write. I have to admit of the three of us, TJ is the better writer.  But Ray and I can hold our own. They both love to cook and are great cooks and that talent they did NOT get from me.  They are musically inclined, good photographers, love dogs (and cats) and basically are just good men.  I wouldn’t exchange either of them.  In fact, I’m glad  we kept the “bruised one” and I think TJ would agree with me.

So guys, don’t be too upset with me about showing off your pictures.  You know, I could have pulled out those of you laying bare-butt on a blanket and I have to admit I did think about it.  But, I decided I wouldn’t do that to you.